Yep, this is the question that is in my overactive mind most of the time at the moment.
I can feel that I need time.
I can feel that I am restless.
I can feel that I need to just be for a while.
But my mind is racing, trying to think of the book I want to write, the things I want to sort out, the next steps after the summer, etc...
Nothing is really happening because I am not ready, but I find it hard to just relax, even though I know it is the only thing I need right now.
Anyway today I took the decision not to go on holidays to Crete with my aunts in September. I feel I need to focus my energy around here, spending time with my family, maybe visiting the few relatives and friends I have in France and Switzerland, as I will then probably not see them for a while, when I go to the States. It would have been nice to go, but it doesn't feel like that is where I should focus my time, money and energy right now.
Things are a bit strange at the moment.
I have the feeling I am doing nothing all day. Wasting time. But I know that I couldn't do more even if I wanted it.
So we'll see, I will give myself a bit more time, so I can evacuate the restlessness.
3 comments:
You're not wasting time, you're fermenting, like good wine! What I mean is, sometimes it looks like nothing is happening (like wine just sitting there in a barrel, apparently doing nothing, but it's really not), because perhaps nothing is happening externally, but something internal is going on that takes plenty of energy. I hope you can allow yourself to enjoy the internal shifts.
I agree with Darcy, give yourself time to adjust...feel your direction and soon it will come. Besides, I'm sure you could write an outline for your book so that when it's time, you'll know exactly what to write...you could also get yourself a little dictaphone to carry with you so that you can maybe put yourself some notes on when you think of them. Just some ideas which, I'm sure you've already thought of.
I have felt that restlessness...I think that usually happens when you've done something that exciting as your Santiago trip and then you're still coming down off that high...you accomplished a great feat...you're looking for something more and it will come...wait and see!
Take care, and God Bless!
Della
Thanks guys.
Your both comments mean a lot and also help me a lot.
I am actually learning to enjoy the not knowing what's coming next...
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